Hi, Julie's Readers! I'm Audrey, also known as a lover of Sangria. There are two things you need to know about me before reading this post: 1. I've somewhat recently become a major wuss about scary movies; and 2. I'm a little afraid of the ocean. Or, more specifically, I'm a lot afraid of the sharp-toothed things that live in the ocean.
"Alright," you're surely thinking, "that Open Water movie probably scared the pants off of her and now she's going to tell us about it."
Well, you're half right. That Open Water movie did scare the pants off of me (much to my husband's delight -- ba-dum-ching!), but I'm not here to tell you about that. No, I'm here to tell you about another scary movie set in the ocean:
Finding Nemo
"The kids' movie?" you ask?
Yes, the movie that is supposedly appropriate for children. Very very brave children.
It's true: the first time I saw Finding Nemo I thought it was scary. In my defense, I saw it in a theater (full of children up way past their bedtime at a 10:00 show) on a very large screen with very intimidating surround sound. Which will add suspense to even the tamest of movies. At least if you're a wuss like me. Which apparently, all these Late Bedtime Kids are not, because none of them seemed to be clutching their mothers' arms the way I was clutching Tim's arm through the majority of the film. (That would be my husband Tim, not Julie's boyfriend Tim. It's confusing, I know. Try to keep up.)
Okay, let me explain a little. You guys, there are sharks in the ocean. And other bite-y things that bite you with their big sharp teeth. And also, in the ocean, things sneak up on you. It's a big place, that ocean, and things can just emerge steathfully out of the blue to come and bite you. It's not cool.
So, Finding Nemo takes place in the ocean, as you hopefully know. And in this movie, there are a lot of scenes where wee little cartoon fish are hanging out against a seemingly harmless wide blue ocean backdrop. A wide blue ocean backdrop out of which any number of alarmingly scary fish could emerge at any moment. I spent every single scene like this not watching the wee little cartoon fish, but rather watching that background, bracing myself for some scary creature to come creeping up behind the wee little cartoon fish and swallow them whole.
And then! The wee little cartoon fish went deeper into the depths of the ocean! Where instead of a wide blue backdrop there was a dark, terrifiying, wide black backdrop. And holy guacamole did some scary fish ever emerge from those black depths. The teeth! And the lights that apparently make you high! Connected to teeth! Holy crap! How were the kids in that theater not screaming in terror? (They must have been asleep by then, it being so far past their bedtime; it's the only plausible explanation.)
The ocean is a scary place, you guys. And Finding Nemo is a damn scary movie. At least if you're a big wuss like me.
5 comments:
Oh Audrey. This is hilarious. I CANNOT believe you were scared of Nemo! Did the friendly voice of Ellen DeGeneres help comfort you at all? I hope so!
I may or may not have been afraid of the sharks in Finding Nemo, and the jellyfish, and the whale. The little pre-school fish were cute though!
xox
haha, this is awesome. i thought the beginning of finding nemo was pretty scary to say the least. and the rest of it was pretty okay for me, and i'm a major ocean wuss as well. :)
While I was not afraid of the movie, the ocean itself is quite terrifying to me. Things are all moving around and touching you under the water. Yuck!
Laurel -- Sadly, I didn't find Ellen's voice very comforting.
Heidi -- EXACTLY. The whale was the scariest part of all!
Katelin -- The thing about the beginning was that I thought it was going to be the scariest part. So I relaxed a bit. And then there were sharks! And whales! And jelly fish! Should never have relaxed.
Erin -- Thank you for understanding my ocean fears.
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