Nevermind talking around the water cooler....

Co-worker #1: He wants a what?
Co-worker #2: Yea I know.
Co-worker #3: Is he European?
#2: No.
#3: Well is he Asian? Oh wait. I remember his name... he's Japanese.
#1: Wait, what does he want?
#2: A Bidet!
#1: WHAT!
#3: In European countries they're separate, so you'd have the toilet and the bidet in the bathroom. But in Japan, they're one in the same. There's just different buttons you can push to get the Bidet.
#2: Oh that's not right. That's like washing yourself with toilet water!
#1: Yeah. I am not about to use dirty toilet water to wash "down there".

Then my phone rang... and I had to stop eavesdropping.

So of course, my ADD takes me to wikipedia's definition of BIDET.

A bidet is a low-mounted plumbing fixture or type of sink intended for washing the external genitalia and the anus.

And then I lost it. Anus. Anus. Anus.
But I continued on:

Bidets are common bathroom fixtures in some European countries (especially Greece, Italy, Spain and Portugal), Latin America(especially Argentina and Uruguay; there they are found in approximately 90% of households), the Middle East and some parts of(particularly in India Pakistan Japan). They may be installed both in private homes and hotels. In Japan, South Asia and throughout the Middle East bidets are so common that they are often present in public toilet facilities.

In 1980 the first "paperless toilet" was launched in Japan, a combination toilet and bidet which also dries the user after washing. Combination toilet-bidets are particularly popular in Japan, found in approximately 60% of households. They are commonly found in hotels and even some public facilities. These bidet-toilets, along with toilet seat/bidet units (to convert an existing toilet) are sold in many countries including the United States. (I find this hard to belive. Do you loyal readers know of anyone living in the US that has a bidet in their house? People who were not born and raised here do not count).

My fist run in with a bidet was when I was living in Argentina on an exchange program with my High School. My friends and I thought it was the funniest thing we have ever seen. All of our host families had them. There was even one in the McDonald's that we frequented. Yuck.

I was too chicken to try it out. But I bet that some kids on my trip tried it out. Don't worry I won't call you out.